The McCain/Palin Constituency: A photo essay in 3 parts
Constituent #1
"SG" name: "Thurston Howell IV"
Income bracket: $250K+
Residence: Coastal communities/ gated subdivisions (Home= 4200 sq. ft under air)
Favorite magazine: Forbes
Prized possessions: 54' Hatteras Convertible Sport Fisher, bright red Ferrari Enzo F60, brand new set of custom fitted Callaway golf clubs
Periodontal profile: a full compliment of 32 teeth (professionally whitened of course)
Ideological slogan: "Drill Baby Drill!"
Commentary: As much as I dislike it, I get it. Voting is purely a business decision; as always, its about the almighty dollar for the Howells
Constituent #2
"SG" name: Pammy Pious
Income bracket: $30K+
Residence: Middle Town USA
Favorite magazine: Faith & Family
Prized possession: Blessed mother Virgin Mary statue in side garden, lawn jockey in back yard
Periodontal profile: ranges from 25+ coffee stained choppers to ill fitting, lipstick smeared dentures
Ideological slogan: "Sarah Palin is filled with the holy spirit!"
Commentary: Say it with me genius once and for all... you are NOT Joe the Plumber!!!
Periodontal profile: ranges from 25+ coffee stained choppers to ill fitting, lipstick smeared dentures
Ideological slogan: "Sarah Palin is filled with the holy spirit!"
Commentary: Say it with me genius once and for all... you are NOT Joe the Plumber!!!
Constituent #3
"SG" name: Joe 12 Pack
Income bracket: tough to determine due to odd jobs under the table; over/under is around $6K
Residence: inhabits predominantly Caucasian locales
Favorite magazine: Guns & Ammo
Prized possession: King of the Hill starter kit (wife beater, case of Alamo beer, carton of generic menthols and the latest version of Boomhauer's English for Dummies)
Periodontal profile: roughly 7 and a half chic lets per person
Ideological slogan: "I ain't votin' for no nigra.."
Prized possession: King of the Hill starter kit (wife beater, case of Alamo beer, carton of generic menthols and the latest version of Boomhauer's English for Dummies)
Periodontal profile: roughly 7 and a half chic lets per person
Ideological slogan: "I ain't votin' for no nigra.."
Commentary: Don't you just love this precious little tree ornament?!
I know I know, "Heritage NOT Hate", right? Unfortunately, deep rooted bigotry will likely compel many to vote against their own socio economic well being.
Be afraid, be very afraid!
-A
*please note that sweeping generalizations are for entertainment purposes ONLY and are not part of a healthy. well balanced life style. :)
1 comment:
I'd like to nominate this for post of the year (thus far). We should have an annual awards show - the Rankies! Or - the Members! The trophy could be the "Gold Member". It could be a giant golden shlon- OK, maybe not. Anyway, I'm bloody gobsmacked. Utterly brilliant. This makes me want to carry a camera with me everywhere I go.
SUUU-fucking-PERB, Brother Axis. If this stuff wasn't backed by indisputable photographic evidence you'd think it was fiction. Way to get those shots. It's exhilirating, yet soul-crushing. America has so far to go... ~OZONE
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